They Say I’m a Dreamer

Yesterday, I was going about my morning and getting ready for work, but I stopped midway to read my Bible and find a verse to chew on for the day. I made a decision to just stop, park it, and find something that the Lord could speak to me about throughout my day.

So I came upon 1 Cor. 2:3-5 in the Message translation which says, I was unsure of how to go about this, and felt totally inadequate—I was scared to death, if you want the truth of it—and so nothing I said could have impressed you or anyone else. But the Message came through anyway. God’s Spirit and God’s power did it, which made it clear that your life of faith is a response to God’s power, not to some fancy mental or emotional footwork by me or anyone else.

Initially, it seemed odd that I would choose that verse because I haven’t, um… sat down and shared my faith with someone lately… or led anyone to the Lord… or spoken publicly… or anything notable in recent days. I couldn’t think of a personal example of how this verse fits into what my life experience has been lately. But I couldn’t let go of it, so there it was… that was my verse for the day.

As I kept thinking about it while doing my hair and makeup, the Lord began to show me some things. He wasn’t showing me anything about how it relates to YESTERDAY—or anything in my PAST, but he was showing me NEW things about my FUTURE. I don’t know that I’ve ever had an experience like this. It was so real… and I teeter on the word tangible. I wished it would never end. He does speak to me and I do know His voice, but it seems like it’s everyone else who has an “encounter with God”… but anyway, there I was. That in itself was melting me.

The Lord began impressing upon my heart some of the things He has in store for me. I was wondering if I was daydreaming because I thought SURELY that He couldn’t mean ME. I’m the first person to admit that (as the verse above says) I feel “totally inadequate” at times and the things I was pondering in my heart kind of “scared me to death”. Maybe you’ve had the same thoughts in your own life. He showed me something specific in my present-day life that (in my head) would be like catapulting me forward. Whether or not that particular thing comes to pass or if it’s something else, I believe He used that one thing as an example because I can relate to “that”. I can now believe for “that” because He showed me how much He wants me to position myself… and to SEE myself… as worthy to receive His blessings. He wants me to see myself through HIS eyes.

As I was telling my husband about all of this, I know I came across as a sheepish little school girl. After all, who am I to think that I could aspire to this “one” thing? I was kind of embarrassed at first to tell anyone, but since I got a glimpse of what He’s calling me to do, and I saw myself doing it, I also had a new faith to believe… and a heightened confidence in His love and power I didn’t have before.

I have insecurities like anyone else, and sometimes I struggle with not doing things well enough… or even thinking that I’m not good enough. I’ve made a lot of mistakes, and God and I both know every one of them! But yet, He STILL wants to use me to make my part of the world a better place, to influence others, and draw people to Him?! I don’t think I’ll ever NOT marvel at that!!! He doesn’t expect me to be perfect, but in order to fulfill the plan He has for me, I need to be willing to take a step of faith and get uncomfortable. It’s His power and His Spirit that get things accomplished anyway, so why would I think He wouldn’t be there leading me in it?!

Since I’m no different than anyone else, my prayer for all of you is that you see yourself doing greater things for the kingdom of God than you ever dreamed possible. He’s already given us the gifts and the tools to be successful in every endeavor, and sometimes WE (…and our fears) are the only thing holding ourselves back. Dream on, but don’t stop there. Begin to walk it out… one step at a time.

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